Friday, August 30, 2013

#SSNC ~ Girlfriends are Angels sent down from above..

Today's blog is meant to be a dedication to all these amazing ladies that have stood by my side during my lowest moments and have always been there either in person or in spirit to celebrate my success. Some, I have known before I became a single parent and others, post divorce. They were and will always be an important part of my life and one of the main contributors to my growth. Memories of us together & their unending generosity will forever remain etched in my heart. People say, choose your friends wisely. They will either make you or break you. I have so many friends. When it comes to friendship, I do not choose. I believe everyone is unique. There are no two person alike, for every single one of them has something to share or teach you. Variety is after all, the spice of life. It keeps my life colourful. I tend to think of each person as being good until proven otherwise. Only then, will I choose to stay away.

What makes these ladies special, is the fact that they love me, care for my family, took the time to keep in touch, to offer support, to not be afraid to tell things like it is - straight into my face, to not be embarrassed by having a friend like me, for accepting me warts and all, for making me feel useful by needing my help sometimes and for most importantly, wanting to be in my life...

Here they are, in no random order :)
1) Leela ~ My colleague, my friend. We flew to Frankfurt nearly 15 years ago and it was our  luck to have served a German couple on board, ( which she still keeps in touch with ) who decided to invite us over to their home and from then on, we have been close friends. Throughout our flying days, we have introduced each other to some of our new international friends that we have met on board and will always try to hang out together, bringing them to visit Malaysia through our eyes. She'll be the one driving, I'll be the one chatting. Leela has a big heart. She includes me in most of her activities. Without fail, she'll invite my family & I to her home for Deepavali every year. FYI ~ Her mom is a good tailor and has sewn a few Saree blouses for me. Her dad is a taxi driver and that must be the reason why, she knows every damn corner and shortcuts there is in KL :)

                                                     " I am OK daaa.. " ~ Leela 

2) Sukee ~ One half of the Saree Queen combo. That's what I call her. Super sexy in a quiet way. Seldom complains at all. The first time she flew with me, she said that I was aloof.  It was during our second flight together that we became fast friends. Not only is she my Clubbing kaki but also my Climbing kaki. I have traveled into deep Borneo jungles with her, coming out of it smelling like shit and yet we managed to enjoy every moment of it. She is quite a strong and brave woman too. Mentally & physically. One who doesn't judge, neither gossips and is always there in fun times & bad times :)
                                                     " Wokie Dokie! " ~ Vasukee

3) Jacqi - Where do I begin? Hmm...She was my batchmate in the Airlines. 1 out of 5 good buddies. Her family was my family away from home.  At one stage, my rented place used to be 10 minutes away from her house and I'll end up spending my free time over there. By then, she had left MH and the country. When she came back, she made me one of her bride's maid and when I gave birth, I made her Ryan's Godma. We were miles apart, but always close at heart. Sometimes, if I am lucky..I'll get to meet up and stay over at her home in Nazareth when I am in New York. We call her The Energizer Bunny. She practically organized her own wedding, half way across the world. I had to only attend! She makes the most awesome pineapple tarts and chocolate brownies ever..A mother of 3 now and is truly a superwoman. I got to meet the latest addition to their family recently. They are home for the summer holidays  :)

  " There comes a time in everybody's life, we have to make hard emotional decisions for the betterment of our self being. You do what you have to do. You will always be my friend. " ~ Jacqi 

4) Jenn ~ One of Jacqi's sister who was there for me when she couldn't be. A person who does not mince her words or wastes time on petty stuff. Being close to Jenn made me feel like as if Jacqi was never gone. An extremely caring and passionate person with a very focused mind. She'll do anything for a friend in need and is truly a beautiful person inside and out. They also have a wonderful elder sister named Judith and I have been so lucky to be loved by them :)

                                       " You are not being true to yourself.." ~  Jenn 

5) Daphne ~ The one that I have known the longest, since childhood. We grew up, went our separate ways (  she was working with SQ while I joined MH a year later ), led our own lives, flew around the world, fell in love, fell out of love, kept in touch through our mothers and a year after I became a single mom, she became my biggest supporter. By then, she was back in KL for good and we had the opportunity to reconnect and get back to basics. She helped me pick up my broken pieces and I helped drag her up Mount Kinabalu :)

                                         " Oii! You so free ah? Mental..." ~ Daphne 

6) Mandana ~ The single one most important friend that was there for me when my marriage went down the drain. I had only known her for about a year before that but because she was a neighbour of mine and has a son of the same age, we ended up spending quite a fair amount of time in each other's houses. She loves my son like her own. My mom was her mom away from home. When I told her that we'll have to move out due to my impending divorce, she was devastated! I was a walking, talking Zombie and everyday, without fail..she will walk over in the hot sun to my home, to pass to my mom the food that she had cooked for us. Her family was our rock. They kept my mom and I sane. Her husband, her son and her sister would keep my son entertained while I cry over her shoulders every day. It was a miserable time for all of us. She felt my pain like as if it is her own. We might be from 2 different countries, but our hearts beat as one. She and her family are now back in Iran but we will always be family to each other :)

                                                    " How is Ryan? " ~ Mandana 

7) Michie ~ One of the prettiest & nicest girls that I have ever had the pleasure to work with. Humble and mature beyond her age. A combination of beauty with brains. She left the Airlines a few years ago but not her friends. I attended her lovely wedding, we did a few activities together and she has been Ryan's number one big sister! She surprised him with a collection of Xmas goodies last year, a free massage for my mom a few months ago and is one of them who will be the first to participate  in a good cause that I am in :)

                              " I am interested! Count me in! " ~ Michelle Vanessa Lee

8) Grace ~ I knew her before I became a  mother. We seldom meet because of our tight schedules. She is an avid yoga practitioner and also a colleague of mine but she never fails to find time to keep in touch . She has even surprised me on some occasions with either a gift or her presence. I love how positive and balanced she is. She might be a few years younger than I but believe me, when I say that I value and respect what she has to say, much! A woman that knows her worth and is not afraid to expect nothing less :)

                                           " Tell me when. I'll be there! " ~ Grace 

9) Carol ~ My dive buddy, my hiking mate and fellow Aqua girl. She has been in the Airlines as long as I have been but we have only gotten closer since we started diving together, a year or so ago. Since then, I have come to get to know her better and have enjoyed her company quite a bit. She's fun to be around. I have also been pretty touched by all the things that she has done for my family and I. A Sarawakian lass you can depend on, who keeps true to her word :)

                                                 " Interesting..Nak! " ~    Carol 

10) Sharon & Elsie ~ Two peas in a pod. BFF since college days. Gorgeous Sabahan girls with hearts of gold! Sharon's an amazing singer and once, when I was sad, she sent me a recording of her voice, singing a song about staying happy. It was one of the most meaningful thing anyone has ever done for me and I felt so loved :)

                                     " Bila mau karoks??? " ~ Carol, Sharon & Elsie 

11) Melanie ~ The sweetest subordinate that I have ever had a chance to work with, who is now a very good friend. I first met her on a daily flight to a destination that I have forgotten, 4 years ago. It was the day after my divorce. Mel was looking forward to fly with me. She had heard a lot about me from the rest and wanted to meet me in person. Unfortunately, I was such a wreck that day, therefore she had no choice but to work alone. My body was there but my mind and heart were somewhere else. She sensed my grief but she assumed that someone had died. She asked for my number at the end of the flight and when she finally found out about what happened, she took it upon herself to make me happy again. Every month she would text me her roster, insist that I go out with her on our off days and made sure that I stay connected. She was the one who taught me that life is worth living again, by ingesting dance and music back into my soul :)
                                         " Jas, nak pergi Library tak? " ~ Melanie

12) Doreen ~ Every flying mother needs another flying mother who is just as crazy as her :) She has a lovely daughter the same age as my boy. We enjoy travelling together and taking turns to keep an eye on each other's baby. Our favourite destination? The beach!!!!!

" Yoohoo...Where are you? " ~ Doreen 

13) Yasmin ~ She lives around my area but the day we became closer, she moved away. She's no longer flying and is a full time mom to a wonderful sweet natured and well behaved boy, named Adam. He is the same age as Ryan. Yasmin's a total sweetheart who has been flying for ages, is now retired and finally enjoying family life. She bakes well and I love eating all of it :)  

               " Semoga Allah continue to watch over you & your family Jess.." ~ Nur Yasmin 

14) Casey ~ My pee partner and tent mate at Rinjani that I met for the first time in June 2012. It was love at first sight! We gelled from the start. I believe that people who pee together, stay together and true enough, we have kept in touch since. Casey had gone on to trek Nepal earlier this year for a charitable cause and I did Mount Kinabalu again recently, for a different cause. Even though we did separate climbs, we are each other's #1 fan :)

" Apa you takde ya? You can use my gears. Ganbatte! " ~ Casey 

Casey sent this picture to me the night before I did my recent climb and it helped me to feel motivated.
" It looks like it's glowing from within. " She said. " When the flower withers, the seeds emerges for consumption. It symbolizes beauty ( when it blooms ) and as it matures ( withers ), it becomes a source of food " ~ Casey Ngo

Have a friend, but treat her such,
Never let her know too much, 
For if that friend, may turn a foe,
All your secrets the world will know...

** Some thinks that women are vengeful & horrible backstabbers. I... could not have survived, without my GIRLFRIENDS...They have been more than a blessing in my life.


  1. Jess, this piece was a darn good read. As much as you have these ladies as YOUR good friends, I am all too sure, you are just as good a friend. I am sorry you had to go through what you did. However, You and Ryan have made this par and I am all too sure, you'll go the distance whenever need be. "eaesy peasey" aye? God Bless Sweetie! XOXOXO Alicia

  2. Thank you very much Alicia, for your kind words. May God Bless you and family too :)